Stop the Rep-LARPing: Train Like a Scientist, Not a Pigeon
TL;DR – Your Programming Needs Fewer Carrots
Here’s what we learned:
Carrots ≠ night vision. That was a British cover-up.
Pigeons once got a missile-guiding grant. Project Pigeon
Stop mixing training styles. Pick one, use it well, progress it logically.
Percentages aren’t evil. But they aren’t sacred either.
Nervous system adapts to load. Don’t skip the heavy days.
Don’t program to the mean. Program to the person.
Train smarter, not fancier.
Let’s start with something that sounds like a high school improv scene gone wrong: carrots, pigeons, and progressive overload. You might be wondering what the hell these things have in common. The answer? Everything. And nothing. Mostly, it's a story about how propaganda, pigeon-guided missiles, and misunderstood rep schemes have more in common than we’d like to admit.
The Great Carrot Lie
First, the carrots. You’ve probably been told since you were a kid that carrots are good for your eyes. Maybe your mom even said it with the authority of a surgeon general as she slammed a plate of limp baby carrots next to your mac & cheese. The thing is—that’s propaganda. Literal wartime propaganda.
During WWII, British pilots suddenly got way better at spotting German planes at night. The real reason? Radar. But the British military, not wanting to tip their technological hand, said: “Nah, it’s the carrots. Our boys just eat a ton of carrots.”
Boom. A legend was born. Posters popped up across the UK with cartoon characters like “Dr. Carrot” and “Potato Pete” (we’re not kidding) telling you to eat your way to night vision. The real motive was to cover up advancements in radar and to encourage people to eat locally grown tubers because, well, it’s hard to import pineapples during an air raid.
So yes, your mom was a war-time information vector. She was just doing her job, unknowingly helping cover up classified intel and boost root vegetable sales. Respect.
The Pigeon Who Could Steer a Missile
Let’s double down on the ridiculousness. Did you know the U.S. government gave $25,000 to fund a program where pigeons were trained to guide missiles?
Enter B.F. Skinner, godfather of behaviorism and, apparently, pigeon whisperer. The idea was simple: train pigeons to peck at images of enemy ships on a screen inside a missile nose cone, and use that pecking to steer the missile mid-air. Totally normal.
You’re probably laughing right now, but pigeons are absurdly smart. They can identify cancer in radiology scans, differentiate art styles, and develop superstitions if you reinforce random behaviors. They're the first real sports scientists: hyper-focused on stimulus, data-driven, and weirdly committed to pecking the same spot over and over.
So yes, while dolphins were out here squeaking and detecting underwater mines (more on that another day), pigeons were dialed in. Bomb-locked. If this doesn’t scream "underutilized high-performance asset," what does?
Lessons from Pigeon Propaganda
There’s something beautiful about the absurdity of this history. It teaches a hard truth: people believe what’s repeated. If you say “carrots improve vision” long enough, it becomes gospel. If you slap "3x12" on enough workout PDFs, that becomes gospel too—even if it's about as scientific as Dr. Carrot himself.
Which brings us to the weight room.
The Programming Propaganda Machine
Somewhere between "Do 3 sets of 15" and "train to failure every time," we've created our own version of wartime misinformation. Coaches everywhere are parroting outdated set/rep schemes like they’re sacred texts. But what if we told you most of them were guesses to begin with? What if we told you your accessory exercises don’t need percentages, and RIR might just be a fancy acronym for “Making Stuff Up"?
Let’s zoom in.
You’ve probably heard someone say, “Do 3 sets of 10 at 70%.” But for who? 70% of what? On compound, multi-joint, single-dumbbell circus movements like “lateral step-up to overhead press to reverse lunge to prayer,” percentages fall apart. They’re about as accurate as a pigeon in a hurricane. That movement doesn’t have a 1-rep max. The weakest joint—be it your shoulder, your hip, or your emotional stability—is the limiting factor.
So what do we do?
Slide, Don’t Guess
Dan (the scientist formerly known as a strength coach) laid it out: use slides. Forget percentages on these oddball lifts. Start with a best guess. Let’s say 15lb dumbbells. If you hit all the reps, slide it up next time. Maybe 20lbs. Boom—progression. It’s simple. It’s honest. It works.
Most of the slide charts we looked at capped out around 5% increases in intensity and 9% increases in volume. That’s enough. If you’re progressing beyond that every week, you’re either an alien or lying.
And if you're using RIR ("Reps in Reserve") to justify sandbagging your training, we see you. Doing three sets of 12 with five RIR? You’re basically just doing movement cosplay. Don’t call it training if you’re out here warming up for 30 minutes and calling it work.
Pick a load. Own it. Slide it when it’s time.
Programming Isn’t a Mad Lib
The obsession with percentages came from a good place—structure, consistency, planning. But we went too far. You’re now more likely to see a program that reads like this:
3 sets of 6 reps at 82.5% of 1RM, RIR 2, bar speed > 0.5m/s
…than something useful.
Pick one system. If you’re using RIR, use it. If you’re using velocity-based training, cool. If you’re doing percentage-based progressions, commit. But don't triple stack them like a bad smoothie.
Better yet, focus on intelligent progression.
If you hit 3x10 one week, next week could be:
4x10 (volume up)
3x12 (reps up)
3x10 @ heavier weight (intensity up)
But don’t mix all three and expect clean data or clear adaptation. Cook your rice one way, then season to taste. Brown or white, it doesn't matter. Just don’t flip-flop mid-meal and call it Michelin.
Strength Is a Nervous System Game
Why lift heavy? That’s a question we should ask more often. Heavy training (read: 80–90%+ 1RM) isn’t just about flexing in the mirror—it’s about driving nervous system adaptation. Getting your body used to coordinating, firing, and recruiting motor units with precision and intensity.
You don’t need a 1-rep max grinder to do that. You can get there with doubles and triples, even clean singles at 85–90%.
Charles Poliquin once called it the “Five Percent Solution.” Not 20%. Not 50%. Just 4–5%. By the end of the cycle you can expect to gain a minimum total of 10% from smart 6 week training over a cycle. You know what that is? A win.
If it takes you three years to double your squat, you’re doing it wrong. Unless you’re a pigeon, in which case—respect. But for most humans, we’re looking for steady, smart, systemized loading that respects the body and makes you stronger over time without blowing your back out trying to chase a mythical number.
The Real Secret: Permission to Progress
Coaches, athletes, and even weekend warriors need permission. Not to go hard—but to go smart. You’re allowed to lift light and progress. You’re allowed to increase by 5 pounds. You’re allowed to treat step-ups and dumbbell rows like real lifts, with real loading, and real progression schemes.
But you’re not allowed to blindly follow propaganda.
Not from 1940s cartoon vegetables. Not from Internet coaches using six acronyms in a single set prescription. Not from your high school football coach’s crusty spreadsheet from 1996.
And if you're still unsure, just remember: some guy out there is still telling his kids to eat carrots for their eyes. Be better than that guy.
Be a pigeon.
